Rule #3 – Flip the Script: It’s Not About You

We started this journey with your ideal state—your vision for the kind of leader you want to become. Then we moved into telling the world (or at least your team) that you’re on a mission to improve. Now, it’s time to take a sharp turn—a full 180.

Let’s talk about WIIFM: What’s In It For Me?
It might sound selfish, but this one simple question is at the heart of how people operate—and how great leaders lead. It’s not about what you want from others. It’s about what they get from working with you.

While the first two steps focused on your awareness and accountability, Step Three is about how you’re perceived by others—and more importantly, how you genuinely treat them. Are you just trying to get things done through your team? Or have you embraced Stephen Covey’s abundance mentality—the belief that there’s enough success to go around, and your role is to help everyone around you rise?

Rule #3: Your primary job is to help everyone on your team become more successful.

That’s right. Your success depends on their success. This might sound counterintuitive, especially for those of us raised in cultures that glorify individual achievement. In much of the Western world, we’re taught to win, dominate, outperform. “Second place is just the first loser,” right?

But here’s the twist: If you want to be truly exceptional as a leader, you have to flip that mindset. The most impactful leaders are not those who outshine their team, but those who light the path for their team to shine.

In contrast, many Eastern cultures place greater value on the collective—the team, the community, the family. The leader’s role is to build a culture where everyone grows. That’s the irony: by shifting your focus away from yourself and toward your team, you actually elevate your own performance and outcomes in the process.

Leadership Is Not a Solo Sport

Think about it: Would a loving parent pursue a path that put their children at risk just so they could “win”? Of course not. And yet in the workplace, too many still operate with a “me first” mentality. That’s not leadership—that’s ego.

True leadership means investing in your people. It means showing up every day with the goal of making them better, stronger, more capable. And when they win, so do you.

ACTION ITEM #3

Meet one-on-one with each member of your team. Ask them what their most important professional goal is right now. Then make a commitment to help them achieve it—whatever that looks like. Accountability runs both ways, so make sure they know you’re serious. And then… follow through.